Smaller Than Your Elbow

I like to visit with my neighbors. I learn a lot from the time I spend with them - about “real” African life (as opposed to the relative “luxury” I enjoy), about culture, about Krio. Recently, Mama Sisi reached out and caught a chicken that was wandering by. (The chicken’s name is Nancy, namesake of her owner, Mama Nancy.) I watched as Mama Sisi selected a feather and plucked it right out of Nancy’s wing. She started peeling part of the fluffy part from the shaft, leaving the tip of the feather intact.

I quietly watched in fascination. What was she going to do with this feather? Which part of it was she going to use? And then she held the shaft of the feather, putting the tip in her ear as she twirled it between her fingers. It was a homemade Q-tip. I guess her mother never told her not to put anything smaller than your elbow in your ear!

I’ve also heard that you can use a piece of charcoal to clean your teeth in absence of a toothbrush and toothpaste. Honestly, I haven’t had the courage to try it yet.

"Xtreme Bumper Stickers" - My Small, Personal Amusement

The streets in Freetown are crazy! There are pedestrians, vehicles, animals, carts, bicycles, etc. all sharing the road together. Most people walk in the road rather than the sidewalk, and if you traversed the sidewalk, you’d join them in the street – better to risk your life with the vehicles than chance falling in a giant sidewalk hole to the gutter below. Plus, it is extremely difficult to see when you’re driving at night – lack of electricity makes it dark, and the people are dark and hard to see as well. Taxis stop almost anywhere they choose to pick up or drop off a fare, seemingly oblivious to all other traffic. And you really don’t “need” all the room we are used to in America – just a couple inches between you and the next car is sufficient room to pass!

I think my blood pressure increased every time I entered a vehicle the first few weeks I was in Sierra Leone. I knew we were going to “bang” someone or something! Plus, I honestly thought the church van we often rode in during my first two weeks here was a death trap! To keep my blood pressure under control and my sanity intact, I had to get my mind on something else. So I indulged in a small personal amusement…

Many of the taxis and podapodas (Podapodas are a form of public transport – small vans with bench seats that are almost always crammed full of Africans!) in the country have sayings painted on the hood, rear, or bumper of the vehicle. I like to think of them as “Xtreme Bumper Stickers.” Instead of just chuckling to myself as I read them, I started recording my favorites in a notebook. (Focusing on the painted sayings rather than the chaos in the streets really helped me tremendously!) Most of these 180+ “Xtreme bumper stickers” were collected during my first 4-6 weeks in Sierra Leone. I’ve since become accustomed to the chaotic streets and even feel comfortable driving now!

My favorites are in bold print. Humorous misspellings are italicized. A few have explanations at the end of the list. Enjoy!

Arsenal *
Man United *
Manchester United *
Chelsea *
Liverpool *
Bercelona *
Real Madrid *
Back In Action
“Y” Worry
007
Syborg
T Man
Wolf Catcher
Wisdom
Dreams
Promise
Promotion
Confidence
Famous
Neatness
Goodness
Harmony
Peace and Love
Heroism
Justice
Miracle
Paradise
Always
Best Paddy **
Control It
Relax
Cry For Help
Perfect
British
In God We Trust
Mama’s Blessing
Blessed is the Man…
God Bless
God Bless #3 ***
God Bless Patricia
God Bless the Onwer
God Bless Aunty Z
God Bless Mi Mama
God Bless the Provider
God Bless Allah ****
God Bless Islam *****
God Bless Unity
More Blessing
My God is Good
God is Great
God is in Control
God is on Our Side
God is My Hope
God is My Provider
God Loves You Smile ******
God’s Time is the Best
God’s Gift
Lion of Judah
Christ the Solid Rock
Jehovah Jireh
Jehovah Jirret
Oh Lord My Father
The Lord is My Shepherd
Jesus is a Winner Man
Jesus is Alive Forever
Jesus is the Answer
Let Us Pray
Prayer
Prayer is the Key
Player is the Key
I Will Praise My Maker
Great is Thy Faithful
To God Be the Glory
To God Be Thy Glory
Thank You God
Thank You Jesus
Father We Thank You
In Everything Give Thanks
Sword of the Spirit
Psalm 27:4-5
Psalm 30
Psalm 100
Psalm 121
Luke 1:37
1 Cor. 15:88
Smile For Me
You & Me
You’ll Never Walk Alone
Welcome
God Go With You
Safe Journey
See You Again
Take Care of My Back
2 Unite
Be Honest
Be Justice
Be Patience
Be Yourself
It is Well
Conscious *******
Sober Man
Destiny
Destiny Fulfilled
Destiny & Fulfilled
Destiny Women
Labour and Expect
The Pride is Back
Brotherly Love
Brothers at Work
Another Level
Another West Life
Hard Life
Enemy Shame
Police Nation
Respect the Law
Respect
World Peace
Believe in God
BigBigGod.Com
Let God Arise
Arise and Shine
Divine Favour
Maranatha
Faith
Faith Healing
Have Faith in God
Work By Faith
Live on Hope
Only God
Only God Knows
Change You Attitude
Givers Never Lack
Every Problem Has an Expiring Date
Fear Jugdement Day
Fear Not the World
Fear Not the World But the People
Trust Not in Man
Man is Born to Make History
Light In Darkness
I Know I Will Make It
Things Will Be Sweet
Sweet Love
Love is Wicked
White Teeth Black Heart
They Must Talk of You
The Evil Men Do Lives Beyond Them
Nobody Knows Tomorrow
No Body No Tomorrow
No Money No Friend
No Money No Respect
No Joke
Mama Africa
Big Father
Busy Man
White Boy
My Only Son
Unique Family
Man Cat
Top Model
Doctor
Young Investor
Designer
The Master
Manager
Investor
Liberator
The Transporter
Defender
Lifeline
Super Larj
To Taste
This Time
Time To Pray
Time Will Tell
Timeing
One More Chance
More Effort
More Potent
Surprise Dem
What’s Up!
It’s On
I Like It
Make it Rain
Money Maker


*Arsenal, Manchester United, Chelsea, Liverpool, Barcelona, Real Madrid: European soccer teams
**Best Paddy: “Paddy” is the Krio word for Friend.
***God Bless #3: Is this the #3 van in the God Bless “fleet” or is #3 someone specific?
****God Bless Allah: How powerful is Allah if God is above him and can bless him?
*****God Bless Islam: I’m not sure about a religion that needs God’s blessing.
******God Loves You Smile: Is this like “Smile! God loves you.” ? Or does God love YOUR smile?

*******Conscious: Very helpful when driving!

A Little Extra Protein?

We just got back to Freetown from a week in the provinces. In Kamakwie, Kathy and I stayed in a room at the home of the Wesleyan missionary doctor and his wife. The members of the Freetown church stayed at a guest house just down the street. Several ladies from our church cooked some fabulous meals for us in the outdoor “kitchen” behind the guest house. It qualifies as a kitchen because that is where the cooking takes place, not by any structure that identifies it as a kitchen. According to the Sierra Leoneans (at least the ones we were with), “all good things take place in the kitchen.” (Hey, that’s just like at home, where everyone ends up gathering in the kitchen.)The rice and “soups” (or meat and sauces to pour over the rice) were cooked in pots balanced on three rocks over a small wood fire. A few things were cooked using small, portable coal stoves.

Tuesday morning, Kathy and I went to have our breakfast in the kitchen. They served freshly fried plantains with a yummy “gravy” of onions and peppers. There was a basket of fish smoking on a small stove, and Kathy and I both took a picture because it’s just not a common sight in America. I am always full of questions, so I asked Brother Bola about the fish in the basket. He identified several of the fish for me and told me we had brought them with us from Freetown. He said the fish had been bought already smoked but they were smoking them some more. Then he mentioned maggots and walked away to take care of something else. Kathy and I raised our brows and wondered aloud to each other if the fish was being smoked to prevent maggots or get rid of maggots. Neither of us was sure.

My grandmother used to say if you called a business and didn’t get the answer you wanted or expected you shouldn’t get upset. Just hang up and call back. Chances are you’ll talk to someone else who just might give you a different answer. I employ her method often – not only to get a favorable answer but also to get much-needed additional information. This was just such a moment. So I asked Mrs. Weekes, the “head chef,” about the fish being smoked in the basket. With a big smile, she said we’d brought them from Freetown, but they had to be cooked some more because they had maggots. Her response was perfect because it was delivered with a smile and matter-of-factness that suggested this was a normal occurrence. With full realization that she’s surely eaten “maggot fish” before, Kathy quickly muttered to me, “I’m not eating any fish in the soup today.” And she didn’t. For the record, the cassava leaves tasted the same as usual, and so did the fish. :) The neighborhood girls enjoyed it as well.

Truly, I did not intend for this blog to be a place to record all the stories to gross everyone out, but there are just so many “missionary adventures” to share with you! God bless!

Boxing Day 2008 - The Big Football Match

At home, I’ve often shopped for bargains the day after Christmas, but this year I “celebrated” Boxing Day for the first time. (Our missionary friends from the UK couldn’t tell us the origin of the holiday, so I celebrated Sierra Leonean-style - with sports.) Our house is in the Wilberforce area of Freetown. Wilberforce Village proper is located up the hill from our house. There is a primary school, a junior secondary school, and a large football (soccer) field in Wilberforce Village. One day when I was visiting with some of my neighbors on our street corner, one of the guys mentioned that there would be an entertaining football match in the morning on Boxing Day. It would be the Single people vs. the Married people, with no rules. It sounded like fun, so I made sure they’d include me when they went to the game.

So on Boxing Day, they knocked on our gate and I walked up the hill to the football field with Usman and Olaji and had a nice chat with them while we waited for the start of the “big match”. My friend Nana and her children Ishmael, Mariam, and Fatima joined us a little later. I had been warned that they didn’t allow the really skilled players to be part of the game. Plus, there really were very few rules enforced, just as Olaji had described. I saw a man hanging off the back of another man to keep him from the ball, a spectator kick a ball away that was headed toward a goal, and plenty of general chaos. The first match was for the ladies –Hilarious! No one had scored at the end of the game, so the women alternated penalty kicks until everyone had attempted to score. The married women beat the younger and more skilled (slightly) single women. Then the men played. This also was a scoreless match until the married men scored a goal about 2 minutes before the final whistle.

This annual match is a big deal. The field had been freshly outlined, a “set” (a sound system with speakers and a microphone) had been rented, and announcers called play-by-play. (It made me think of the announcing “talent” in Beaverton as displayed at summer camps and Family Days at Alpenrose Dairy! I know that made some of you smile.) The teams even had uniforms. A huge crowd was gathered for the match, and three police officers patrolled the area. We only stayed for the football matches, but I was told that there would be volleyball and basketball games following.

My “hosts” for the day fed me lunch during the second half of the men’s match. Usman’s auntie, whose second-story house and front porch overlooked the football field, made couscous and roasted pepper chicken. I walked down the hill toward home holding hands with Mariam and Fatima. It was a very fun day – in part because it was a shared experience with my new friends in this new culture, but also because my friends were enjoying themselves so much. Life can be really tough here, so I think the times of fun and laughter are savored even more.

Hair Planting... Another Big Mistake!

Kathy and I had our hair "planted" before the Beaverton Foursquare team arrived. I wasn't convinced I wanted to do it but went ahead with the process anyway.

Personally, it was a big mistake, and I won't do it again. The rubber bands and the tightness of the braids broke a lot of hair. It only cost about $7, and I left the braids in for almost 48 hours. I was so relieved to get them out, even though it left me with Tina Turner hair until I washed it.

Here are the pictures you've been asking for!

A Little Advice: When you visit the village, stay on the footpath!

In the west, we are particular about our bathrooms. We are accustomed for them to look a certain way, and many of us like our commode at home best. (How many of you bolted off the bus because you wouldn't use the school bathrooms?) And when we travel abroad, we are often concerned about the “facilities.” In fact, we actually require a lesson in order to use some bathrooms in the world (like a traditional Thai toilet or bath).

In Africa, it is pretty obvious what to do when the bathroom is a hole in the ground. However, a recent trip to the bathroom in Kagbaray village left me with an important question. My question then became, “To whom do I ask this important question?” The answer was Hawa. Hawa is an amazing lady that Mike met in Freetown when he visited Sierra Leone in March. Not only is she smart, beautiful, full of the love of Christ, promoting social justice in Sierra Leone and seeing changes take place by God’s hand and grace, she’s also kind and fun. If you knew Hawa, you’d love her and want to spend time with her, too!

Now, back to my important question… Kathy and I look forward to our weekly prayer meetings with Hawa on Friday nights. And I chose last Friday to inquire of Hawa (after a lead-in that explained how silly I felt asking this question but needing to know the answer so I could at the very least instruct teams that visit in the future), “When you visit a village and the bathroom is a pile of rocks, what do you do if you need to poop?”

Her answer went something like this, “You should go out in the grass. If you want to, you can use some grass or dirt to kind of cover it up when you’re done.”

“Just out in the grass?” I continued. “Not in the hut with the rocks?”

“Yes, in the grass.” Hawa was patient to explain. “Pick some tall grass off the footpath.”

And then she offered this most useful bit of wisdom: “When you visit the village, you should stay on the footpath. You don’t know what you might find when you leave the footpath. Yes, in the village, stay on the footpath.”

Of course we all laughed. I thanked Hawa for her instruction and insight. And I was doubly glad that I’d asked the question.

Bigyay Bra Spayda

Bra Spayda (Brother Spider) is a character in many Krio fables. He tries to get everything for himself (usually food) and thinks himself very clever, but he winds up with nothing. Today, we had to turn in a story about Bra Spayda for our Krio lesson. My teacher (Violet), my neighbor (Abdul), Bakarr, and Kathy all laughed, so I’ll count it as a success. Here is the story I wrote (with an English translation following):

(Krio uses some vowels we don’t have in English, so I will approximate the best I can.)
Bra Spayda get et pikin. Wan tem di pikin tel am “Wi angri! Ples go ton foh bred. Wi go day o!”

Bra Spayda go ton. Di makit uman de sel fo smohl bred en wan jayant bred. Bra Spayda i tink i need di jayant bred foh di pikin bikohs na behs at ohl. I aks di makit uman ohmos i de sehl i jayant bred. Di makit uman se ne Le 18,000. Bra Spayda i get Le 100. I aks di makit uman foh sel in jayant bred foh Le 100. I se “Noh. Mi smohl bred na Le 100.”

Bra Spayda i want ohltin di jayant bred. I se i kin dans foh di jayant bred. I se i kin johmp foh di jayant bred. I se i kin krak jok foh di jayant bred.

Bra Spayda i dans foh di makit uman. Ma kow i bai tu smohl bred. Bra got i bai wan smohl bred. Sista Pus i bai wan smohl bred.

At midulnet, Bra Ohkpohloh i bai di jayant bred. Bra Spayda luk foh di smohl bred but i noh si natin. Bra Spayda i waka go no os with noh bred bikohs i get bigyay.

Now, the English translation:
Brother Spider had eight children. One time the children told him, “We are hungry! Please go to town for some bread. We are going to die!”

Brother Spider went to town. The market woman was selling four small loaves of bread and one giant loaf of bread. Brother Spider thought he needed the giant bread for the children because it was the very best one. He asked the market woman how much the giant bread cost. She said it cost 18,000 Leones. Brother Spider had 100 Leones. He asked the market woman to sell the giant bread for 100 Leones. She said, “No, 100 Leones is the price of my small bread.”

Brother Spider only wanted the giant bread. He said he could dance in exchange for the giant bread. He said he would jump for the giant bread. He said he would tell jokes for the giant bread.

While Brother Spider danced for the market woman, Mother Cow bought two small loaves of bread, Brother Goat bought a small loaf, and Sister Cat bought a small bread.

At midnight, Brother Frog bought the giant bread. Brother Spider looked for the small bread but saw nothing. Brother Spider walked home without any bread because of his big eyes (his greed or gluttony).

Stay tuned for Kathy’s Bra Spayda story…